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What is your Driver? Love or Fear?

Modern psychology espouses that there are two main drivers in the human psyche that propel us to act in any given situation. They are simply Love and Fear. We mistakenly sometimes express the opposite of Love as Hate. But truly. The opposite of Love is Fear. And Grief is often Love with no place to go.

If we think & feel about it, and really drill down to every active or passive decision we have ever made, we can probably agree with this assessment.

Did I act out of Love or did I act out of Fear?

Which emotion propelled me forward or backward at any given time in my life.

What drove me....?

To make that deal. To speak to this person. To travel to that country. To go to that event. To buy my home. To accept my job. To publish this post.

Ultimately when we ponder this question for ourselves based on past actions or inactions, we are also answering the key overarching questions - namely:

"Am I living my life based on Love or based on Fear?"

"Which of Love or Fear motivate me on a daily basis?"

As Aline Muller so astutely states in her article "Acting out of Love or Acting out of Fear" (Dec 19 2020), both love and fear can "support me taking the same action...and they can [both] co-exist. Yet, where I am acting from and what I get to experience is entirely different. The result of our actions might be the same, regardless....But we don’t live the results. We live the processes, the day-to-day, the how. The what is the destination. The reasons, the feelings, the process make the road we walk on every single day....That is the difference between living out of love and living out of fear.

"Living out of love is an inspiring message, and yet a hard one to apply in practice and live by."

Yet, as we attempt to manifest our sweet dreams & visions into sweeter tangible realities on our daily life journeys, answering these questions honestly always requires a balanced exercise of head/mind & heart/gut. The harmony of logical thought & intuitive feeling. The mindfulness and tuning of each of the 5 senses, together with the alignment of each of the 5 states of being - mind, body, heart, soul & spirit.

For some people, this alignment manifests through physical movement, such as dance or yoga. The body never lies and these feeling will linger on in our muscle memory for days, years, generations and even evolving lifetimes. For others, complete alignment to arrive at truth, requires a quietening of the mind, such as mindfulness & meditation, especially while grounding/earthing in nature.

Often we may associate the words "I want" with acting out of love; and the words "I should" with acting out of fear.

Muller goes on to analyse that "[g]iven the ubiquity of fear in our society....[t]o connect to different inner voices is a challenge.."

This is so true, particularly now, in this present moment, in our first month of 2021. The chaotic fear outside of us is so strongly palpable, but oh so sorrowfully not palatable. And for many of us, Grief is a recurring emotion daily as we intuitively, truthfully and empathically want to individually act out of Love in the face of this strong collective Fear...yet feeling like Lone Love in the face of Mass Fear we may be overwhelmed into a state of hopelessness, helplessness and silent grief, for it feels like our Love has no place to go, other than to Grief.

Dear Friends, let us not lose hope with all of this global noise, fear, grief and madness. For practically, the human spirit is resilient and eternally loving.

Livwriv (live with Riv) is here to advocate & support the alignment through love in all of our home, relationships and business/career decisions. Let us be present with presence to truly think, feel, speak & act out of love for "[t]he way to expand love in our lives [and our world] is to keep choosing love." Please feel free to reach out and book a session at if you are feeling fragile in any of these key areas during these times of external mayhem. We are here to applaud and support your visions to live with expansive love in all areas of your life, and re-channel your grief to the affirming love of life.

I hope we keep choosing love, over and over again, even when we feel it hasn't chosen us. I pray we continue to build bridges of love into 2021. I yearn to manifest together with all of you, the year of the ultimate sweet healing, pleasure, abundance and harmony of 5 (2+2+1= 5). We can do this by honouring our humanity's learnings and teachings from 2020 (year of 4) and overflowing those lessons into all of our personal & professional endeavours, as well as our individual & collective journeys as we keep moving onwards and upwards.

With Love & Light


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